Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Lefties, gays and discrimination

Born as a left hander, i was discriminated by this world right from the very start of my life. When i started picking up objects with my left hand instead of my right, i would be berated by my parents. Whenever i reached out with my left hand, i would be smacked. You see, in an ancient language called Latin, the holy Latin dictionary defines that left means sinister while right means dexterity.

Society not only frowns upon lefties and views them as unnatural and deviant. It discriminates them as well. From scissors, rifles, lecture theatre writing "pads", chain saws, pencil sharpeners and what have you, all are designed for the right handers (no pun intended). Even base ball gloves are designed for the right handers. It's like the whole world is against you!

It got even worse when i started to look for jobs. Prospective employers actually rejected my application for the job on grounds that "left handers are unable to operated machinery designed for right handers efficiently"!

So i felt this had to stop. Discrimination whether racial, sexual, age or handedness is just wrong. I formed a support group for "southpaws" like me, with the intention to campaign for equal rights. I invited a renowned professor from overseas, who was an expert on the subject of "handedness" to give a talk on this subject. I wanted to use this opportunity to clear up the common misconception that lefties are "sinister", which was the consensus of the public at that time. I wanted to create awareness on the discrimination faced by lefties like me in our daily lives.

Alas, the talk was cancelled at the last minute. The minister of state said that the cancellation of the talk was on grounds for public safety and public interest. Public interest because left handedness increases the chance of one being epileptic, schizophrenic, autistic, dyslexic, and mentally retarded. He said that if more people were to become left handed as a result of activism by my support group, this might increase number of handicapped people in society and even the number of schizophrenic murderers in society! Public safety because most of the members of the public are conservative. There will be heated exchanges between parties on both sides on this issue and some will get into fights. Blood will be spilt and lives will be lost.

Ok. Enough of this silly spoof. I may be a leftie but i'm not discriminated against till that extent. Just have a read on this report by CNA

"Foreigners will not be allowed to interfere in Singapore's domestic affairs"

It is mind boggling how Ho Peng Kee came to that conclusion despite even MM Lee indicating a willingness to losen the noose on the gay community.

By the way, here's an article on the Religious Affiliations of MPs in Singapore by Yawningbread.

Go figure.


Lim Leng Hiong said...

An interesting analogy of the situation.

It's a disappointment that Section 377A is not repealed. After all that other section about oral/anal sex between consensual heterosexual couples has already been repealed. 377A is an old-fashioned law out of place in a modern nation.

In today's ST, a NTU survey says 7 out of 10 people frown on homosexuality. They didn't provide many details but it's hard to imagine how the primary opponents (mainly Christians and Muslims that constitute 30% of our population) can make up 70% of the respondents.

Also, there are surprisingly few people who are neutral about this matter (about 8%), considering the stereotype of Singaporeans not giving a shit about anything.

I must be stupid said...

The NTU survey probably phrased the question in a way such as "Do you think homosexuality is disgusting/abnormal/deviant?" and then claim that a high percentage of the population are against repealling section 377A.

After all, marketers can claim that their frying pan is the "hottest" product around when in fact their frying pans burn food charcoal black. Lol

Anonymous said...

I am a left hander.

The reply from the minister of state, he really reply you that? Goodness, who is this smart aleck? Didn't he know that Lee Hsien Loong is a left hander?

I must be stupid said...

Hi anon,

This post was meant to be spoof of the discrimination homosexuals face in singapore. No minister of state actually discriminates against lefties, but the reply Ho Peng Kee gave when deciding to cancel a talk by a canadian law expert seems to be based on out-of-this-world logic.